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Playing The Field In Online Dating

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Jessica Kohl on May 1, 2014 - 10:00 pm in Dating Tips

Are you a person who likes to juggle dating several people at once? It can be exciting and fun especially with all of the different profiles and opportunities of meeting new people. However, it can also get complicated and you might end up scaring off the one you really want. Being with one person can feel like a leap of faith as it limits your options and you may feel like you are missing out on another opportunity. Or maybe you are afraid of being too attached too soon while they are still playing the field.


Here are a few tips to help you decide when to stop dating other people.


1.  Keep it open from the start. 

If you want to find the right girl/guy for you out of a sea of possibilities, you’ve got to meet a lot of people pretty quickly. This is easiest if you date multiple people at the same time. There’s nothing wrong with going out with three or more men/women in a week during this process and easy thing to accomplish when you have pools of singles to choose from on dating sites like Crush.com . You’re still exploring your options and seeing who’s out there. You can weed through a lot of options pretty quickly this way. Those who don’t have the right chemistry with you won’t have a second date, and you can focus more on those with the spark.


2.  Be honest but discreet. 

Don’t keep it a secret that you’re dating other people. There’s nothing wrong with that at this point in the game, and if asked, be open about it.  On the other hand, don’t start telling stories about the escapades you had the night before. Nobody wants to hear about your other options, and feeling like they’re one of a harem could be a real turn-off for some. Make the person you’re with feel special and appreciated not like a ticket in a line-up.


3.  Start narrowing it down

As you meet and date more, you’ll start to find a few who are the most appealing to you. You might move from several dates a week, to just two or three solid choices. This can be a tricky stage to maintain. If you’ve been seeing somebody for a month, s/he may think it’s time to get more serious.


4.  No double standards.

What’s good for the goose is good for the gander. If you’re dating around, then s/he can too. You can’t very well expect your date to accept the fact that you’re still seeing other people if you get jealous and upset about them doing the same thing. If you’re both dating around, that’s a workable arrangement, but you can’t have your fun and expect monogamy at the same time.


5.  Deciding on the one.

Sooner or later, you will find that one of the people you’ve been dating is consistently the one that makes you the happiest, and the one that you want to be with. If you hate the thought of him or her going out with other people and want them all for yourself, then it’s time to give them the same in return. Discuss it openly, and let each other know that you’re going to stop dating anyone else. Deactivate your profile on Crush.com or anywhere else (dating is dating whether it’s in person or online). If you’re right for each other, they’ll do the same, and you can move on happily to the next stage of your relationship. 

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